Black blood runs beneath the bottom line

Filled with a lot of simmering rage today. My return to work was a thankless and unappreciative venture. I want to be altruistic, yet free of guilt and still believe in the inherent good and brotherhood of man and cameraderie in the workplace and all that gunk. But the reality is that the world is a backstabbing cheap ass jungle and if you don't have the will and the skill to fuck your brother but good, then you can't expect anything for freem cheap or fair value.

Okay G, what'd you do wrong? I had an orange juice, OK? Well, that beverage ain't complimentary here. Whew...good thing they haven't noticed the fancy profligate latte's I've been fixing myself. Dude, anything to keep my ass upright and my till accurate which it's been damn straight! The lesson of course is don't get caught, but being devious doesn't work for me and if you run a venture with that much waste, don't be fuckin nitpicky I say. How many espresso shots do we dump? How many bagels to we chuck, screw the homeless..they don't eat do they? I mulled and stewed for much of the day on the principles of procedures and regulations that I don't completely take as gospel. There is gray area in the service biz that goes for personnel as well as the customer. If you pay $2 for a cookie (previously frozen) $5 for a latte and $10 for a salad and you cheeze them on the napkins, you're not putting the customer first are ya? But these nitpicky things are running through my head, and my God...I'm a good bean counter....do I have a future in this? I hope not. I'm too old anyway....you have a 32 year old manager who looks 10 years older with failing organs already...miserable with life, And you have guys making $8 an hour who have lived...some too hard. I'm in there with guys living in halfway houses, who have their vagrant pals coming by for free bread and water and change exchange. This is all very humbling and I'm just trying to stay that way and evolve, relate and improve my Spanish.

Tonight me and Bean watched ENRON-The smartest guys in the room. Obviously the smartest guy was the one who didn't get prosecuted, Lou Pai who cashed out early, sold his property in Colorado and married a stripper, one among his favorite of company-paid luncheon entertainment items. But obviously the rage at the injustice contiues. People out there, I hear you, the ones who worked hard and believed the gospel of Skilling and reinvested your 401Ks only to get screwed. Once again I feel lucky, although I've never had a 401K, I've been paid off the books, on the books, no interest in the company whatsoever. I doubt I'll ever be a millionaire, too big a conscience. To be a little stock trader, out for a bonus and retire at 30 with a Ferrari and a coke habit ain't for me. I'm scared of a mortgage. If I could do it all over agian, all the money I've wasted could have gotten me a sociology degree. I just want to pondeer humanity, wear argyle sweaters and stroke my beard alot.